Tag Archives: love

Love V Logic

22 Nov

Sex and the City Love Keyring. Image courtesy of utopiabase.com

After watching the first Sex and the City film for the thousandth time, like many girls I was struck by the ‘love over logic’ message.

We all like a happy ending, and what better way to end the film than seeing Carrie and Big embrace in that beautiful apartment (even though we all agreed that we disliked Big).

The line that strikes me is when Carrie says, “It wasn’t logic, it was love.” I remember my maths tutor saying to me whenever I got a question wrong, “good logic, but it isn’t right”.

Should we consider logic when looking for love? Surely, it would be logical to find someone who is able to support you when you need it the most, someone who your family like, shared values, someone who you’ll be able to introduce your friends to…

You’d think so, right?

LOVE ON THE RUN

I was watching last weeks Unreported World on 4od when I came across “Love on the Run”. So many couples risk death, and for their families to turn their backs on them at the very least, for the sake of love.

I watched in horror as the image of a young couple, beaten and hanging, came on the screen. Their family and local authorities had killed the couple, just for falling in love with someone outside of their caste system.

Many couples run away from everything they know, with only the possessions they can carry just so they can be together.

Brave or crazy? Certainly not logical.

ARRANGED MARRIAGES

Many individuals tied to an arrange marriage also turn their back on their cultures own written logic by running away from an arranged marriage with no means to support them.

Maybe their husband was violent, or maybe they just wanted to make the decision themselves.

Regardless, who’s to say it is not right?

I recall a psychology class on love back at college where a study showed that many couples who have arranged marriages end up having a deeper love for each other.

They start off as strangers but learn to compromise, and marriage is more highly regarded than in Western culture.

Also, from seeing how relationships are between people living with friends at university, there is a rather similar correlation. When living with strangers, the bond is often tighter than with chosen friends.

You aren’t afraid to confront strangers if you’re the only one taking the bins out, for example, but with friends it ends up being an underlying niggle.

THE BIG DEBATE

So, my question is, do these arranged marriages last far longer than in Western culture because divorce is frowned upon, or because they really work?

The likelihood is that an arranged marriage would tick all the boxes of my original list, with logic winning the debate.

If this was true, so many people wouldn’t risk their lives for that four letter word.

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